Real Life by Peggi Tustan

Welcome to Real Life . God hates these things. Do I? “Conflict is inevitable, but combat is optional.” –Max Lucado God is not a hater. In fact, quite the opposite. The Scriptures declare: God is love . He is the author, the very source of love. Because love is his priority, God despises behaviors that oppose and destroy love. Seven are specifically named in the book of Proverbs. He identifies them to make us aware, because we are human and fallible and quick to justify our ugly behavior (especially in response to someone else’s ugly behavior). So, our heavenly Father spells it out clearly in Proverbs 6:16-19. These things, he says, I hate: Haughty Eyes “All men are created equal,” [1] states the US Declaration of Independence. The basis of this foundational truth is the Bible ( Genesis 1:27 , Colossians 3:11 , Romans 2:11 ). The standards we use to measure worth—education, beauty, influence, financial status—are irrelevant to God. For what do you and I possess that we have not recei...

Welcome to Real Life.  It's not always fair. "Resentment is an early warning signal for needed change." –Dr. Henry Cloud “I totally agree with the older brother,” Jill told our group. Six of us were gathered around my kitchen table discussing the Parable of the Prodigal Son. “If we serve God our entire lives,” she said, “And then a mean and selfish person prays for forgiveness on his death bed, and God welcomes him into heaven—just like he welcomes you and me—it’s just not fair!” The parable focuses on the younger brother. He demands his inheritance early, and then leaves home and burns through his windfall on wild living. Hungry, humble, and repentant, he returns to seek his father’s forgiveness. The father is waiting, not with a lecture, but with a loving embrace. The son whom he feared was dead has returned alive. He wraps his robe around his son’s shoulders, places a ring on his son’s finger, and throws a grand party. The entire household celebrates, minus one. The ol...

Welcome to Real Life ! Are you hungry? “Dinner with friends is cheaper than therapy!” –Anonymous It wasn’t just good people who came to hear Jesus teach. Liars, cheaters, and prostitutes also drew near to hear his words of truth, hope, and forgiveness. The religious leaders muttered, “This man welcomes sinners and eats with them .” [1] Did you catch that? Not only did Jesus welcome sinners into his presence as he taught and proclaimed the kingdom of God, he ate with them. That means he sat down, shared a meal, and spent time talking with people who were unchurched, unholy, and unredeemed. Why did he do that? “You cannot know God if you do not experience being known by him.” [2] Not only did Jesus want people to know who he is and why he came, he wanted them to experience being known by God.  I see you.  I know who you are. I care about you. One of my favorite things is to meet a friend for dinner. We don’t rush. We relax and take our time eating and enjoying each other’s com...

Welcome to Real Life. The only stupid question is the one we fail to ask. Who am I? Why am I here? What is life for? What is beyond this life? I was sixteen and sitting in a social studies class when I first heard these questions. A fellow student posed them to our teacher. After a long pause, she replied, “I don’t know. These are the big questions of life. Everyone is searching for the answers. You must find them on your own.” I still remember how her answer (or lack thereof) left me feeling empty and dissatisfied. What is the meaning of life? If my older and wiser teacher had no answers, how could I find them? How would you answer these questions? It’s interesting. Many of us will live our entire lives—distracted by the busyness of daily routines and responsibilities—and never stop to ponder the reason for our existence. Believe it or not, within a year of sitting in that social studies class, I found the answers. I was invited to a church. For the first time, I heard the Good News t...

Welcome to Real Life . Can you hear me now? Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person, they are almost indistinguishable. – David Augsburger [1] “Please look at me when I’m talking to you!” I would often say this to my sons while they were growing up. Because if they were playing and distracted, they might hear my words, but until I looked into their eyes, I couldn’t be sure they actually grasped what I was saying. We adults are not much different. We’re busy and distracted. We hear words all day long. But are we actively listening? Jesus Christ was incredibly busy in his earthly ministry. Yet he took the time to listen. At the pool of Bethesda, he asked the paralytic, “Do you want to get well?” [2] When his friend Lazarus died, Jesus listened to Mary’s and Martha’s words of disappointment and grief; and he wept with them. [3]    When the blind beggar Bartimaeus called out to him, Jesus stopped and asked, “What do you want me to do for you?” [4] Jesu...

Welcome to Real Life . Got friends? “Friendship is born of that moment when one person says to another, ‘What? You, too? I thought I was the only one.’” –C.S. Lewis We are meant to live in community. God created us to need one another. You and I are not meant to travel this journey of life alone. Relationships are integral to a healthy existence. In his earthly ministry, Jesus surrounded himself with twelve disciples. They walked, lived, and served together for three full years. Of the twelve, Peter, James, and John became his closest friends. Jesus both needed and modeled healthy relationships. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends , for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. (John 15:15 NIV emphasis mine) In recent decades, our culture has shifted in some pretty dramatic ways. It has become more difficult to build and maintain healthy relationships. “Our ability to connect e...